12-26-24

When I was in High School my Dad and I were sitting in church one Sunday…..have

you ever seen someone who is trying not to laugh because they know they are

not supposed to, or because the time is not appropriate, but they just can’t help

it……and that makes it worse……you get that almost spasmodic face-scrunching

lips-pursed look……well, that was Dad…..I sensed something and looked over and

he had his closed and his shoulders were shaking as he was doing his best not to

laugh……I leaned over a bit and asked, “what are you doing?”…..he caught his

breath a minute and wiped away one of those laughter tears and whispered back,

“look at my feet”……so trying not to be too conspicuous I leaned forward and

looked down and then it was my turn to have a quiet fit……it was all I could do to

keep it together because my Dad was sitting there with two completely different

shoes on! And I don’t mean similar…..not a bit…..one was black with laces and the

other was a medium brown loafer…..apparently he had been getting dressed that

morning and trying to figure out which pair of shoes went with his suit and got

distracted by a phone call or something and never made it back to the ultimate

question…….so off he went to church oblivious to the fact that his feet came from

two different worlds…….to make it funnier he had already spent the morning in

Sunday School and walking around greeting people and being the very visible guy

he was there is no telling how many people saw his crazy foot fashion and just

wondered what was up…..and didn’t nobody say nothin’……we laughed about

that for years……

Well, Dad’s story was good for a laugh and wasn’t really a big deal……My Dad took

it in stride….he laughed about it more than anyone…..but you have to wonder if

there was someone in the room who called themselves his friend who saw the

shoes and chose to not to say anything about it……I mean, why not…..sometimes

friendship means honesty……sometimes when you care about someone it means

telling them things that they may not want to hear……but I’ve got to tell you,

there is strong movement out there that is creating the false narrative that saying

something constructive to someone is a bad thing…….that’s a sentiment that is

good for snowflakes in the echo chambers of safe spaces on college campuses but

it is not a sentiment that is good for life……

well, let me tell you, a good friend….a real friend….is someone who will tell you

something that you need to hear whether or not you want to hear it…..and I don’t

just mean letting you know when you’ve got food in your teeth or when your

shoes don’t match…..although those are important…..I’m talking about being

there to let you know when you’re headed down the wrong path of life……

There is a time and a place, and certainly the manner in which the information is

delivered is also important……and it is also important that you have earned the

right to share candid thoughts and you’re not just butting in with no relationship

to offer unsolicited advice…….but if all of those parameters are in place, then yes,

it needs to happen occasionally……it’s actually healthy……sometimes a snowflake

needs an honest broker in their life….someone who will speak the truth in love….

In my first job out of college I worked in a rehab center for adolescents…..my boss

was of the mind that if we were going to be in the business of helping kids

understand why they might need to change their behavior that we needed to be

able to do so ourselves…..so it wasn’t uncommon for her to make the whole

group of us sit around a conference table and give and receive what she called

constructive feedback……something positive, and something constructive……it

was a royal pain, it felt awkward as all get out, and sometimes it felt like a tooth-

pulling session, but ultimately I saw the value in it……there are times when

maturity, and forthrightness, and leadership, and humility, all have to kick in so

that a person will hear what they don’t want to hear…..and no amount of cry

rooms, or safe spaces, or trigger-free verbiage, or mandated use of pronouns, can

ever save us from the fact that the world is filled with things that we don’t

necessarily like, believe or want to be a part of……

An article came out yesterday that described how liberal comedian and

commentator Bill Maher has once again criticized what he refers to as “woke

progressives”……that’s interesting….not so long ago I would not have thought of

Bill Maher as a guy that would tell liberals what they don’t want to hear……but in

that vein it appears more and more that Maher is just someone who will call it

like he sees it and is of the belief that the far left wokists are destroying his

political party…….this past weekend Maher did a podcast with comedian Jay

Leno….Leno brought up how black comedian Sammy Davis Jr. had caught flack

years ago for hugging white President Richard Nixon…..apparently cancel culture

happened back then to as Hollywood libs cried foul…..Maher reacted to the story

by saying that it galls him that liberals today are openly telling people to

disassociate themselves from family and friends over the holidays if they voted

for Trump!.....Maher said that is one of the things that he hates about the

left…..he went on to say in some pretty colorful language that he doesn’t ever see

himself as a Trump supporter, but at the same time he isn’t going to forsake real

relationships with people he cares about just because of some misguided

sentiment that requires that nobody can ever say something that he doesn’t want

to hear……

Tulsi Gabbard famously left the Democrat Party……significant in any event but

even more so considering that she was most recently a Democrat member of

Congress and ran for President on the Dem ticket…..even when she was still a

registered Democrat though she filed suit against Hillary Clinton for defamation

and called out her own party on multiple issues…..next thing you know she was a

guest host for Tucker Carlson….became friends with Donald Trump and has now

been nominated to serve as the Director of National Intelligence as a Republican

member of the Trump Administration…… Go figure…..

And now we come to the ultimate in safe spaces……the ultimate example of

snowflakes being triggered by the very idea that honest brokers might say things

that make them uncomfortable…….as we wait and watch whether or not

President Biden will pardon everyone and everything that he and his ilk

mistakenly believe that Trump doesn’t like…..We are hearing that Biden is

considering massive proactive pardons for people who haven’t even been

investigated, much less indicted or convicted…..people like Anthony Fauci, Liz

Cheney, Merrick Garland, Alejandro Mayorkas, Adam Schiff, and more…..people

who need Biden to set up a safe space because they don’t want to risk hearing

something that makes them uncomfortable….they can’t abide by the idea that a

Republican Congress might call them to testify and they would have to hear things

that they don’t like….thinks that they need to hear…..things that they absolutely

need to hear……Biden’s pardons are the ultimate example that the left does not

like real constructive criticism…..the left is triggered by truth….horrified by

honesty…..fearful of feedback…..

In the end someone has to say what needs to be said…..someone has to demand

that we be a society that encourages constructive feedback….. that encourages

healthy debate……that’s even scriptural and I’ve quoted it here before, that we

are to “be ready at all times to explain why we believe what we believe, but do so

with gentleness and respect”……that’s in 1 Peter 3:15 by the way……and yes, I

know that verse is really talking about explaining our faith but it is a principle that

can extend to anything…….but the fact that it reminds us to “do so with

gentleness and respect” is a clear indication that there are topics that not

everyone wants to deal with…..but we’re told to be ready to discuss them

anyway…..

We have got to be willing…..able…..and allowed…..to say things that need to be

said, in politics, in family, at work, in life in general……it means being willing to

love ‘em enough to make ‘em mad at you……it means being an honest

broker….and it also means that snowflakes need to step into the real world and

be told things they don’t like sometimes…..

And that’s a wrap for the Rightside Way……